I Deserve It!

Have you ever gone through a hard time and asked yourself "Why is God doing this to me?" I have. Lots of times. Or here's a thought that I never like to admit I've had, "God, I'm doing so much for You! So why are You doing this to me?" After all when we serve God then He's supposed to reward us, right? Wrong.

God doesn't work that way. He's not a vending machine. We don't use our service to Him as quarters that we put in to a machine then select buttons to get the perfect spouse, or that great new home, or even the right job, good health or money to pay the bills out of the machine. 

But what about all those verses that say God will provide, and God will bless us. Are you saying those aren't true? Of course not! However, do you remember the other verses? The ones that talk about God's will? And His timing? Or here's one, that little verse in the middle of the Lord's prayer, Matthew 6:10- ".... your will be done on earth as it is in heaven."

That's a really hard concept to follow through with. When life gets tough, when things don't go the way I want. When a friend unexpectedly contracts cancer and they're far too young to deal with such a tragedy. When a loved one makes decisions that will ruin their life and no one's words or even prayers seem to be turning them back to the right path. When you're trying to do what God wants and things just keep going wrong. The car breaks down, the bill comes due, the kids get sick, the credit card is maxed out. How do you respond then?

Have you ever seen a little kid throw a tantrum? They stomp their foot and cry, or maybe throw themselves on the ground and flail around while screaming at the top of their lungs. But fast forward to their teenage years. Sometimes they yell but teens are experts at the silent treatment. They get angry and they just glare at you but they won't say a word. Too often this is my reaction. Instead of giving God my honest emotions I just get angry and stop talking to Him altogether.

I get so sick of saying "Let Your will be done." So I stop saying anything. Not an idea I would recommend. After all, how am I going to hear Him answer and speak comfort in my darkest days if I'm not listening?

So what do you do? When the bills are piling up? When the car won't start? When you get laid off and you can't provide for your family? Where do you turn then?

Let me suggest two places. The first is the book of Job. The ultimate book of trials, tribulations and standing pure before God despite being stripped of absolutely everything imaginable. 

The second is the book of Psalms. Here you'll read about men like King David who gave every emotion he had to God, the good, the bad, the ugly and the even worse. He laid it all out there on the table! And God called him a man after His own heart.

Life is hard, it's not going to get easier but there's two things you need to know. One- God is good all the time. Two- We don't deserve the things that we think we do. God will provide, He will take care of us but not always in the way we think He should. 

If you want to read a fantastic, real life example of this then pick up the book called "When God Doesn't Fix It" by the renowned singer, songwriter and worship leader Laura Story. Her story and the trials that God took her and her family through will give you a fresh perspective about trials, service to the Lord and His will not ours being done.

Running Away from God

Have you ever had to run after an animal? When I was a teenager I had this horse. His name was Starbucks but I called him Buck. (Yes, I am addicted to coffee.) He was a Mustang and had a mind of his own. One day I got him all saddled up and took him out riding on the paved bike trail across from my house. As we were riding along things were going all right until for some reason I dismounted. I can’t remember now exactly why I got down, maybe he was acting funny and I wanted to check his saddle or he picked up a rock in his shoe? Whatever the reason when I went to mount again Buck decided he was done for the day. Before I knew it he had turned around and was running down the trail away from me!

So there I am running down the pavement in cowboy boots (which are not easy to run in by the way) chasing after this huge horse and yelling his name. “Buck! Buck! Stop Buck!” I’m not sure why I expected him to obey but regardless of my, apparently faulty, logic he just kept running.

I’m sure it was quite the picture, my saddled horse running down the trail and me running behind him screaming my head off. The closer I got the faster he ran, the more I called, the more he ignored me and headed for home.

I thought of this story the other day when I read Hosea 11:2 “But the more they were called, the more they went away from me. They sacrificed to the Baals and they burned incense to images.”

Aren’t we like that with God, constantly running away? The Israelites were. The more God called to them, the more He instructed them to do something the more they ran away from Him. He called them out of Egypt, they complained about the desert and not having water. He provided manna, they wanted meat. He was their ruler, they demanded a king and so on and so forth.

It’s easy to look at the Israelites and see where they went wrong, it’s harder to do that with our own lives. But take a moment to think about it. How often has God told you to do something and you’ve ran away.

Talk to that friend about me.

That friend God, really? Surely you don’t mean that. I must have heard you wrong.

Offer that homeless person that extra food you have in the car.

Oh I can’t do that God, I might get hungry later and I don’t want to stop.

Give up your daily latte one day a week so you can give extra money to your church.

Sorry God, I need the caffeine.

Whatever the situation is we have an amazing skill to run away from God. So next time you hear that still, small, voice try to take a moment and instead of running away like a bratty horse trying to get home, stop and listen and do what He says.

By the way in case you’re curious the horse was fine. A log truck and a couple of cars had to stop in the middle of the road but my mom walked out and the dumb animal ran straight to her, happy to stop and let her lead him safely across the road. Needless to say I wasn’t impressed with his antics and I swear that horse spent the rest of the day laughing at me. However we did make it on our ride. It was just a little delayed and a lot harder than first anticipated.

Fidget Spinners

Oh the wonders of fidget spinners. When I first saw the toy phenomenon sweeping the nation I thought they were silly. I considered it the latest fad that would pass quickly enough. Then I went to spend a week with my family and my cousin brought a fidget spinner. Being the good cousin he is he let me play with it and I quickly found myself addicted.

On the one hand it was a very mindless activity, just watching it spin around and around but on the other hand I was able to come up with different things to do with it- I practiced balancing it on my thumb, then my finger. (Now I know kids do this all the time but I on the other hand had a very hard time accomplishing such feats) I spun it on the table, switched hands, even held it with one finger while my cousin, Ace, held the other side with her finger- it was a strange version of teamwork but a fun one and my awesome big brother took notice of my amusement.

On our way home Benj stopped at the store so he could pick up a few things and then we looked at the display of fidget spinners. He asked which one I liked best but I didn't really answer because it was his toy, not mine although he did let me play with them in the car. Pretty soon I was regretting the fact that I'd have to give them back when we got home but I didn't say anything to him. The next day as he got ready to leave I noticed that he'd left the fidget spinners on the counter. Confused, I asked him about it which is when he told me that he already had some at home, these ones he'd bought for me.

Excited and feeling blessed I immediately put one in my pocket so I could always have it handy to play with. What I wasn't expecting was how much it would help me. From something as simple as giving me something to do with my hands so I don’t pick at my fingernails, (a lifelong bad habit I’ve struggled to break) to actually helping me control my anxiety. When I start feeling anxious I just pull out my fidget spinner and it gives me something to do with my hands, allowing my brain to rest and giving me time to calm down.

It's interesting that a silly toy can have such awesome effects and that got me thinking about the wonders of human ingenuity. People are always creating new toys, devices and tools that are designed to entertain, distract or help us from/in our everyday lives. It’s rather amazing when you think about it. But where does that ingenuity come from?

Well its part of who we are. We are made in the image of God and His creativity is evident all around us. From His creation of mountains to deserts to oceans and forests to all the different kinds of animals He spoke into existence to the beauty of the sunrise and the majestic canvas of the night sky. He created it all, including us. Our creativity is only a dim reflection of His. The ingenuity humans has is really just one more way we show His handiwork in our lives.

Next time you see a new technology come out, or hear about a new cure for whatever disease, or even just find a cool new toy, take a second to thank God for the ingenuity and creativity He gave to those who invented it.

Praying Technology

I actually wrote this post a while ago but in the last few weeks so many tragedies have struck, from the natural disasters to the massacre at Las Vegas. Our thoughts and prayers are with the people affected and their loved ones. Sometimes it's hard though to feel like you're praying with someone who's far away. That's why this post seems fitting for today.


Prayer. It’s an amazing gift. To be able to approach with boldness the throne of the one and only God and present our requests to Him. Not because of anything we’ve done but of the sacrifice of Jesus.

But Jesus doesn’t just leave it there. He goes a step further and says in Matthew 18:20 “Where two or three gather in my name, there I am with them.” I’ve always taken great comfort in this verse and, though I recognizing that prayer can be an intensely personal task, I know there’s something truly special when believers come together to pray because Jesus is there too.

However distance can make this a problem.

How do you pray with someone when you’re in Texas and they’re in Asia? Welcome to the wonders of modern technology.

You can pray over a text message.

Lord, please be with my friend today. You know that she’s not feeling well and I just lift her up to you, asking you to bless her and give her a great day today.

You can pray over email in much the same format and even make it longer or maybe add on to what you would’ve sent over text.

Please help her to feel better soon so that she can accomplish the things that need to get done but also help her to get some rest so her body can heal.

Praying over the phone I find particularly helpful because then I can hear the other person’s response and they can pray alongside me.

Thank you Lord, for this friend who prays for me.

There’s lots of apps that uses audio messages or where you can broadcast videos and either of those are avenues that you can use to pray with or for someone.

Typically I keep my general prayers, like prayers for the nation, or prayers that are likely to upset people, private. However when I want to pray for someone while I’m talking to them but I can’t see them in person this is a great method that can be used. I know it’s not literally the same thing as gathering together but there’s still something powerful about praying with someone even from a distance.

Just something to think about next time distance keeps you away from those you care about and pray for.